eyes wide open

its 4 am and i'm wide awake,sad. i had tiramisu for dessert and the espresso must be the guilty party keeping me up now.  and so in the quietness of the night, idle minds lead to idle thoughts, not very wise i can tell you.  the night plays tricks on your mind, it delves into the mysteries and depths of things you do not want to think about, it takes you into melancholy and the pits..... moral of the story, don't take tiramisu at night :)

what does one do when one realises that love has ebbed, that the waves of the ocean must have taken it away with them, that love after all is only for that moment, and if not nurtured properly, like a plant, it will slowly disappear.  and what remains is just the shell, wondering where the soul has gone to, wishing perhaps for it to be filled, yet wondering if it's best for all.

what does one do when those they care about have moved on or are moving on? isn't it time to let go and create a new life, leaving the past behind in the photo albums and the recesses of the mind, and get on with new paths, new roads to be concerned about.  won't it be less hassle, less fights, less arguments, less concern, less frustration, less disappointment?

yes, definitely, a brand new day, a brand new start, a brand new life, a brand new me..... at least working towards it is a step forward, a note of excitement perhaps in contrast to holding on to the past and wondering what went wrong...

and so you see how destructive the still of the night can be....

Netherlands

NL was good - any holiday is good, but this was more meaningful because it was to visit my girl.  apart from it being too hot, which was a bummer, and the amount of walking after weeks of very hard work in the office, it wasn't the fun part.

I loved Brugge, we have to go back there again for more leisurely walking around the shops. Hoorn is another place i would like to spend another day in; Maarken was very interesting but maybe once is enough. Delft and Hague are worth another more leisurely visit.  Amsterdam? mixed feelings about it really, very cosmopolitan like any big city, very crowded, but interesting, plus we didn't see enough of the place, so yes, another visit coming.

decisions decisions decisions

i have been wondering which dvd to watch, and quite often, end up not watching anything... contemplate too much lah.
should i watch an action movie, or a tearjerker, a light comedy, a family drama, or some romance?  so difficult to decide sometimes.

i recently decided, after 5 minutes of staring at the pile of dvd's, that i would watch The Ghost Writer, my fave Pierce Brosnan - changed halfway to another dvd, not because it wasn't nice, but perhaps i felt like something more racy.. went back to it a few days later to finish the show, and it was good.

Kristen Stewart was good as Joan Jett too, so was Dakota Fanning of course, but i really bought the dvd for Elle.  We watched together which was fun, i probably wouldnt have watched it on my own.

and tonight, i had thought of watching another dvd, but because i couldn't decide which, i ended up with Cafe World :)